Le Metro.

Best to be fully informed before navigating the metro during the hot summer months. First, the rules of airplane travel do not apply. Get a window seat, not an aisle. Passengers stand in the aisle so any attempt at securing personal space or planning an easy exit will be lost. Second, do not sit near the doors. You will be at eye level with body parts that are best reserved for the bedroom. If you have to stand (which is most of the time), try to stand near a window. This will give you the best opportunity for a breeze. Don’t expect A/C on the metros in Paris; there is none. In order to fit in, it’s important that you bring a book and open it, but don’t read it. If you read it, you will miss your stop. While metro stations are clearly marked, signs can be invisible through the crowds. Sometimes there is an announcement of the station, but remember it is French and not English and it sounds like French and not English. If someone comes pouncing down the aisle proclaiming “Bonjour Monsieur, Madame,” followed by a litany of words you don’t understand, pick up the book you are not reading. There are panhandlers galore on the metros in Paris and they ride the rails for free. If he is accompanied by “un chien,” it’s best to have two books or you will soon be supporting both him and his pup. Last but not least, remember not to smile. It’s the metro way.